Online Sermons
Lesson #15 - Preparing Teens To Leave The Nest
Series: Home-BuildersLESSON #15 – PREPARING TEENS TO LEAVE THE NEST
INTRODUCTION
In the book, Whatever Happened To Mom, Dad, & The Kids, co-authored by two of our brethren,
Carl Brecheen and Paul Faulkner, there is an important discussion about “Growing Up And Away”.
In some ways, the link between parents and their teenagers acts like a rubber band. The adolescent years demand a certain
'growing up' and 'growing away'. Growing independence is absolutely essential during these years if normal development is to take place.
HELPING THEM FLY SOLO
It is the responsibility of parents to teach responsibilities to the children.
The goal is not to keep them in the nest forever, but to prepare them to leave home and start a home of their own.
If the rate of growing independence is agreed upon by both parent and child, the tension on the rubber band is minimal.
The rubber band has certain elasticity and can stand some 'strain' without difficulty. But if the teenager wants
too much independence too soon, or if the parents are reluctant to turn over the control to the teenager
as rapidly as the teenager would like, the tension can become almost unbearable. / Brecheen & Faulkner
WHAT ARE SOME NATURAL RITES OF PASSAGE?
What are some steps along the way that will help teenagers transition smoothly into independent and mature adulthood?
Remember: The aim of parenting is to strike a balance between being protective without being overbearing.
1. Economics 101
How important is it to help children learn to manage their money.
Is giving an allowance a good idea? If so, at what age and how much?
Should an older teenager be permitted to have a credit/debit card?
Should they be taught to save some of their money?
2. House Rules
is helping with household chores to be expected - - with or without an allowance?
Is a curfew necessary? Is it to be set in stone? Does it change as the teen gets older?
3. Job Seeking
At what age does your teen need to start thinking about finding a job?
Is a job essential to growing up?
Does a job help facilitate learning to manage one's finances?
4. Dating
When should teens be allowed to “date”?
When can “double-dating” give way to allow freedoms for “just the two of them”?
What discussions need to be undertaken about sexual purity?
How important is it to encourage your teen to think ahead?
i.e., How will they response if and when a friend encourages them to try smoking, pot or drugs, alcohol, sex, etc.?
5. Driving
At what age should a teen start driving a vehicle?
How many are allowed in one car at a time?
How about “reporting in” from time to time.
6. Social Media
Smart phones … The Internet … Texting … Tweeting …
How valuable is it to teach discipline and restraint.
