Online Sermons
Lesson #14 - The Teen Years
Series: Home-BuildersLESSON #14 – THE TEEN YEARS
INTRODUCTION
In his book, Exposing The Myths Of Parenthood, David Jeremiah discusses, Myth Eight: “Teens Are Trouble” (pgs.137-156).
...This myth has been perpetuated by the exceptions, not the rule. For every headline made by the teenage drug user, runaway, or suicide, there are hundreds of stories about kids who survive those years between childhood and adulthood with only a minimum of trauma.
That being said, it is true that the teen years often present special challenges for both teens and their parents.
ADOLESCENCE BRINGS GROWING UP AND GROWING AWAY
~ With the onset of puberty dramatic changes begin to take place in a child, both physically and emotionally.
- A child's desire to grow more independent follows the natural course of human development. cf. 1Cor.13:11
- If the teenager wants too much independence too soon, or if parents are reluctant to turn over the control to
the teenager as rapidly as the teenager would like, the tension can become almost unbearable. / Paul Faulkner
ROOTS AND WINGS
~ In its simplest form, a parent's role is to first GROUND their children and then eventually to give them FLIGHT.
- Lk.2:41f records an incident in the life of Christ that occurred when Jesus was 12 years old.
Although the chief purpose of this text is not to offer instruction and guidance about the adolescent years,
it does, however, convey the “tension” that often begins to develop between an adolescent and his parents.
- Nothing else of Jesus' early years is recorded - - we go from Jesus at age 12 to Jesus at about the age of 30 (Lk.3:23).
The cultural circumstances between first century Judaism and the 21st century American are significantly different,
however, it would be a mistake to think that the parents of Jesus kept Him “under their thumb” until the age of 30.
TRANSFORMATIONAL NECESSITIES
Teenagers undergo a metamorphosis that yearns for privacy but also cries out for assistance and/or intervention.
The aim of parenting is to strike a balance between being protective without being overbearing.
A parents' goal is to stimulate independence without being too permissive, distant or disengaged.
How can a mother and father help shape the mind, heart and soul of their adolescent children?
1. Keep the word of God central.
2Tim.3:15 / from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give
you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.
2. Provide them with a consistent model of life as a Christian.
Nothing thwarts efforts to raise godly teens more than inconsistency and hypocrisy on the part of his or her parents.
In order to be a good example (1Tim.4:12), teens need a good example.
3. A united front is critical.
Parents needed to work as a team and not undermine each other.
4. Encourage the careful selection of close friends.
1Cor.15:33 / Bad company corrupts good morals.
5. Allow them to sprout their wings.
The transference of responsibilities is best performed incrementally, with an emphasis on accountability.
Rules of engagement need to be spelled out clearly and explicit boundaries are essential, even among mature teenagers.
6. Hold them accountable.
Freedom must be anchored in trust. When a trust is violated, consequences must be forthcoming.
This requires lots of affirmation, encouragement, re-direction and forgiveness.
