Lesson #11 - Enabling Children In Good Ways

Terry Siverd
09/16/18 - Sun AM

LESSON #11 – ENABLING CHILDREN IN GOOD WAYS

INTRODUCTION

Nowadays we typically view the term “enabler” in a negative light - - as one to allows something bad to go unchecked.

However, there are many good ways to enable our children and thereby better prepare them for childhood and adulthood.

PROVIDING STABILITY

~ A sense of stability will go a long way in nourishing a child's psychological and spiritual health.

- Living in a time when divorces are prevalent, one of the greatest worries children have is wondering if they

 might come home from school, like many of their classmates, to find a mom and dad who are separated.

- This anxiety is exacerbated when children witness their parents feuding more often than not.

~ Continue to cultivate a resolution to be together as husband and wife for life.

Assure you children often that you two (as their parents) love each other dearly and are committed to marriage.

~ While it may be advantageous to agree to argue in private (out of the sight and hearing of your children),

it is also very important to show your children how to practice conflict resolution in a well-tempered fashion.

After all, how realistic is it to think a child will never need problem-solving skills?

- How can one be angry and yet not sin? (Eph.4:26a)

- How does one not let the sun go down on their wrath? (Eph.4:26b)

- Show your children how to practice the virtue of “self-control” (2Pet.1:6).

TEACHING ACCOUNTABILITY

~ While establishing boundaries (what is right and what is wrong), an emphasis also needs to be given to accountability.

- Learning to confess sin (bad behavior) early in life is critical to shaping a child's heart to be obedient to the will of God.

cf. Js.5:16 and 1Jn.2:9

~ Teach your children to “own up” to their mistakes and misbehavior.

- It is not at all helpful to whitewash wrong-doings.

- At what young age should the concept of “personal responsibility” begin to be taught?

- Teach your children the value of saying, “I'm sorry!” and asking for forgiveness.

~ Children need to learn that there are consequences for bad behavior (Prov.3:7-8;  13:18 & 20  and 14:12).

Explain to them the harm done by misdeeds and hold them accountable for such.

 ENCOURAGING SOCIABILITY

~ While involvement in both church and school will help children develop social skills, the home remains the key.

Children need to learn how to get along with others - - their siblings, playmates, classmates, and eventually, workmates.

- The golden rule is truly GOLDEN.

Mt.7:12 / However you want people to treat you, so treat them...

~ The New Testament is filled with “one-another passages” that teach social skills.

- Many of these citations are short and easy to memorize and ought to be required learning for our kids!

Love one another/1Pet.4:8 … Be kind to one another and forgiven one another/Eph.4:32 …

Bear with one another/Eph.4:2 … Encourage one another/1Thess.5:11 … Pray for one another/Js.5:16