CARE-FILLED REBUKE

            Parents are tasked by God to train up a child in the way he should go (Prov.22:6a).   Such training requires disci-pline (Prov.19:18).   Solomon urges, do not hold back discipline from the child, although you beat him with a rod, he will not die (Prov.23:13).   The “rod” is not the only instrument in a parent’s toolbox.  A verbal rebuke often carries more weight than corporal punishment.  Handing out rebukes is tricky business and must be done with discretion.  Constant criticism and never-ending nit-picking weakens the value of an occasional rebuke.  However, when employed judiciously, open rebuke is better than love that is concealed (Prov.27:5).  Smother love looks the other way when a young one mis-behaves, but true love speaks up in the interest of shaping a child for the better, the age of the child notwithstanding.    

            Just as loving parents ought not play the part of sycophants - - full of flattery and void of candor - - so too, for friends.  King Solomon adds, faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy (Prov.27:6).  One might ask, "Why would a true friend ever wound me?"  The answer could well be that their love for you is so deep (and genuine) that they cannot remain silent in overlooking your wrongdoing.  In caring enough about you to correct you, they some-times will put you in your place.  These are the kind of friends we all need.  Ditto for parents.  Moms and dads love their children so very much that they cannot wink in witnessing transgressions on the part of their child. 

            Open rebuke is what the Biblical commentator Adam Clarke referred to as “rough medicine”.   It may not “taste" good when administered, but the results are quite remarkable.  One blogger, who writes notes from the bridge, and con-cludes his essays with his trademark, Kirk Out!, says, “What I do need from friends is gut level honesty.  I need friends that are honest and true, even if I don’t like the kind of truth they are presenting to me."  As the wise man Solomon pre-dicts:  he who rebukes a man will afterward find more favor than he who flatters with the tongue (Prov.28:23).    

                                                                        Terry Siverd / Cortland Church of Christ